Nanny Returns by Emma McLaughlin and Nicola Kraus

*Note: spoilers follow. Not any specific details, more like "meta"-spoilers that might give away the overall attitude of the book, I guess you could say. So if you're worried about that, you might not want to continue reading. Honestly though, I wouldn't suggest reading this book, so my recommendation is to read on!

Summary and review:

Private schools are the new nannying positions in this sequel to The Nanny Diaries. Nan has returned to New York City after a ten-year hiatus, in which she and her husband, "Harvard Hottie" Ryan Hutchinson, have been globe trotting in pursuit of Ryan's career with the UN. In the meantime, Nan earned a master's degree in organizational development. Back in the city, Nan is attempting to juggle the renovation of a crumbling Harlem brownstone with starting a consulting business, while dealing with an absentee husband, run-ins with old high school "friends," and her decade-old guilt over the way she left Grayer and the Xs. Oh, and her husband wants to start a family.

Only a few days back in the city, a very drunk 16-year-old Grayer shows up on Nan's doorstep. His parents have finally split, leaving him alone with a 7-year-old brother, an incapacitated mother, and a need to know why Nan left 10 years ago. Just like that, Nan is thrown back into the bizarro world of the Xs and their Upper-East-Side insanity.

From there, the plot shatters and splits off in about a thousand different directions. There's just too much going on for any one of plot lines to be fully developed, or to arrest the reader's attention and sympathy. The plot line involving Nan's self-absorbed high school acquaintances doesn't seem to add anything to the story other than providing settings for some of the action to play out. The same is true of the story line about Nan's parents possible eviction. The home remodel story fits better, but just goes way too far, until it becomes a little bit ridiculous.

The main plot lines in the story [seem] to be the Xs and Nan's position with a consultant for Jarndyce, an exclusive private school run by an absolutely toxic parental board, which puts the Xs' exploits from the first book to shame. Oh, and Nan having a baby. That's supposed to be one of the main parts of the story, but it's completely overshadowed by everything else going on. Anyway, while working for Jarndyce, Nan is put in a variety of situations that go against her beliefs, providing the perfect opportunity for Nan to stand up stick it to the scum of the East side, but instead, and here come the spoilers, she totally and completely folds in the name of remodeling her new house. The authors tried to excuse Nan's behavior by establishing that she knew the actions she was enabling were morally reprehensible. The thing is, however, that knowing right from wrong and choosing wrong anyway does not make a person any less culpable. It makes you a hypocrite and a coward.

While Nan does her best to help out the X boys, there is no "nanny-cam" moment like the one readers cheered at the conclusion of Nanny Diaries. With the exception of a short outburst to Grayer, Nan never stands up for herself or her supposedly-high morals; in fact, she is complicit in some of the worst goings-on at Jarndyce.

Equally offensive is the barrage of F-words that the reader is pelted with in this book. There are 305 pages in the copy I read, and without going back over the book in its entirety, I feel comfortable saying that the F-word is found on half of those pages, often multiple times.

All in all, I would advise most readers, even those who loved Nanny Diaries, to skip this installment in the life of Nan. ★★☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆ (2/10)

Content:

Blood and gore: N/A
Sex: multiple references to adultery, an explicit "sexting" episode, use of the F-word in a sexual context, and reference to a sexual encounter à la The Graduate. Gross.
Language: abhorrent